You may spend hours, months, years together without fully appreciating what it is that this person means to you.
You may fall in love with someone without fully understanding why it is that you love him or her. Understanding how much you really love someone can take time. Sadly, we often don’t comprehend what it is that we’ve lost until we’ve lost it. Very few can live up to such unrealistic standards. This makes falling for someone new difficult. Anything that falls short simply won’t do.Ī huge problem is the fact that our memories don’t always match up with the reality of the past – we often remember things more colorfully than they actually were. When we broke up with that person, we did so promising ourselves that we’d find better… so we try and find better. When we start to date someone new, we start to pick them apart, comparing them to that one individual we deem to have been "the best we ever had." Others, however, are much larger letdowns. Many of them small, such as in the example above. It’s funny, but generally speaking, life is riddled with letdowns. Everything that we take part in, experience or consume is compared to everything similar that we’ve once experienced as well as to what we, at one point, hoped that we would experience. We live in the moment, future and present. Now, tell me how disappointed you are every time that you take a bite of a different pizza or a different peach and it doesn’t live up to that memory?
Think of the best slice of pizza that you have ever had, or the best, plump and juicy peach that you’ve ever bitten into. Those cracks will always be there, and if they haven’t been filled perfectly by another, then your mind may very well figure out a way to have them filled by their original creator.Ī great love experience puts anything that falls short to shame. When everything that you have become is thanks to this one person whom you had to part ways with, realistically letting that person go and forgetting about him or her isn’t going to happen. Sure, you could continue to make further changes, fill the cracks, build a new foundation, create new cracks to cover up the old, but the scarring will always be there no matter what happens from this point forward. It’s one thing to excommunicate your past lover, but changing the person that you have become isn’t possible. There are people in our lives who have had such a tremendous impact on us – the individuals who we have become – that giving up on them entirely would mean giving up on a part of ourselves. Especially when those things are people who were once incredibly important to us. As much as it is physical, love is mainly psychological – we find it hard to let go of some things.
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